Vancouver Canucks Barely Out-Suck The Edmonton Oilers

photo courtesy of Jonathan Hayward/AP
The Vancouver Canucks were barely able to surpass the lousiness of their Northwest Division rival Edmonton Oilers last night, losing a scoreless game in a shootout, 1-0.

Losing to an offensively-retarded team that only managed 19 shots on goal---most of them weak and easy to stop---is a tall order, but the Canucks were able to make it happen, rewarding the hard work of goalie Roberto Luongo with another pathetic defeat. Sure, they earned a point by dragging the game to overtime, but at least they still failed to score a goal in regulation.

"It's tough to go out there every night and not score a single point, but sometimes we get it done," said an anonymous Canucks player rumored to be center Henrik Sedin. "Roberto looked great out there tonight, so we had no choice but to give him absolutely no scoring support. That's the kind of teammates we are."

The Oilers, on the other hand, gained two points on the Minnesota Wild, who are in second place in the Northwest and who Edmonton plays tonight. This matchup will prove to be another exciting, scoreless game filled with frustrating neutral zone traps and toothless, uncoordinated offensive attacks. Western Conference hockey at its very best!

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Now Or Never

It's now or never for the Canucks, who face elimination tonight in Game 5 of their series against the Anaheim Ducks. They found a little bit of offense in the last game, but managed to blow a two goal lead and lose in overtime, falling three games to one.

Roberto Luongo has to tighten his game, which showed a little bit of weakness, and the Canucks have to remember that scoring goals doesn't mean you can quit playing defense, which they generally do very well. On most nights.

I'm rooting for the Bad Luck 'Nucks, but they're definitely not in a happy place right now. I wonder if Pavel Bure is looking for some part-time work.

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Barely Enough Canucks

Though I'm definitely rooting for them to beat the Ducks, Vancouver right now just doesn't look like a team that can win the Cup. Sure, they won game two of the series, but just barely and it took two overtimes.

As usual, their offensive production is lacking. They've scored only three goals in two games so far, and they still struggle to get any offensive momentum going. The good news is they took 40 shots on goal during regulation in game two, which means they are getting open fairly often, but the true quality scoring chances are rare.

As for Anaheim, I feel sorry for them. They have one of the most potent offenses in the entire league and they have to face Roberto Luongo, who can beat opposing teams sitting on his ass. If that isn't frustrating, I have no idea what is. Last night he had 43 saves on 44 shots for a save percentage of .977. That's just inhuman.

But you can't win a series with superb goaltending alone. Just ask the Devils, who are losing already to the Senators' super offense. You have to have the total package. The only team that really looks like they have the perfect combination of defense, goaltending and offense is the Buffalo Sabres, but they've looked that way all season.

I can't wait for more games.

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No Goal For You

Photo courtesy Chuck Stoody/AP

Marty Turco just put on one of the best goaltending performances we've ever seen. 35 shots, 35 saves, and a 2-0 shutout victory for the Dallas Stars against Vancouver, which evens the series at one game each.

Turco, who has a bad reputation for choking in the playoffs, was simply perfect tonight. He controlled all of his rebounds, didn't let the Canucks push him around in the crease and even tried to score an empty-net goal himself near the end of the game. Overall, it was one of the best hockey games we've seen him play in a long time.

We're still rooting for the Bad Luck 'Nucks to pull this one out, but it's good to see Turco erase the negative talk he's gotten over the years. He's a great goalie, any way you cut it, and he works harder than most guys much younger than him.

Can't wait for game 3.

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Coloardo 3, Vancouver 1

photo courtesy Chuck Stoody/AP

The impossible continues to be the norm as the Colorado Avalanche beat the Vancouver Canucks last night while the Calgary Flames lost to the San Jose Sharks, keeping Colorado in the race for the playoffs and closing the gap between them and the Flames to just three points.

Milan Hejduk scored all three Colorado goals and rookie phenom Paul Stastny assisted on each. Hejduk, who played like he was half asleep for most of the year, has scored ten of his 34 goals since February 27, when the Avs began their desperate run for the final playoff spot. Stastny, who set the NHL record for rookie scoring streaks at 20 games earlier in the year, has scored two goals and five assists in the last four games.

Still standing in the Avs' way are Nashville and Calgary themselves, not to mention a win by Calgary against Edmonton on Saturday that would mean the end to any remaining chance of a playoff spot.

The farther the Avs go, the more potentially painful a Colorado loss or a Calgary win becomes.

And still the question remains: Why the hell didn't Colorado win like this during the rest of the season? Why did they wait until game 65 to remember how to play like the championship teams of 1996 and 2001?

Part of me wants to be proud and impressed by the Avalanche, but the rest of me is nothing but frustrated and disappointed. Hopefully next season they can play like this from the very start. Anything less is unacceptable.

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Worst Case Scenario

It is true that if Colorado loses to Vancouver tonight, their playoff hopes are over. It is also true that if Calgary beats San Jose, the Avs' playoff hopes are over. Either of those possibilities is depressing enough for most fans, but the real worst-case-scenario won't reach its pinnacle until Sunday.

Pretend for a moment that the Avalanche beat the Canucks tonight, say 11-1 (we're pretending), and the Flames lose to the Sharks. Then, the Avs beat the Nashville Predators at home and the Flames lose again, this time to Edmonton (really, we're still pretending). That sets up a true showdown as the Avalanche face the Flames---at home---in the final game of the season on Sunday. The Avs would trail the Flames by only one point, and would need to win (even if it's in overtime) to surpass the Flames and claim the final playoff spot in the Western Conference.

Pretend that all of that happens, and the final showdown really does take place.

And now pretend that the Avs blow the game and lose, missing the playoffs on the final day after a phenomenal 14-2-2 run over the last 18 games of the season. Now, wouldn't that be depressing?

It's amazing the Avalanche have made it this far and still have a chance. The only consolation, I suppose, is that if the NHL had never adopted the ridiculous policy of giving one point to a team that loses in overtime, the Avs would currently be only two points behind Calgary instead of five. But enough pretending already.

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Vancouver 3, Colorado 0

Well, crap. This isn't good at all. With the Flames winning last night, the Avs are now at a point where they can not afford to lose ANY games the rest of the season, including the two remaining against Calgary.

No exceptions. Hopefully no more Theodore, either.

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Colorado 5, Vancouver 4 (SO)

I have to admit, the Avalanche got lucky in this one. They did play hard, though, and Jose Theodore proved once again that while he's a almost always a terrible goalie during regulation, nobody can beat him in a shootout (so far).

And I wonder, why didn't coach Quenneville rest Peter Budaj during the second game against Edmonton last week? That would have been an excellent time to let the workhorse take a day off and recover from his long stretch of starts recently. Just sayin'.

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